Ten Things

A couple of weeks ago, there was a trend rolling around on Facebook where you asked your friends to create a list of "ten things" we may not have known about him/her. Now, I was never asked to create such a list. While it may have been due to the fact that I purposely avoided liking/commenting on a status so that no one could assign me a number, I am suspecting that the true reason is because y'all knew I was going to do this with it.

Sorry. Your ploy almost worked.

So here are my ten things:
(I prettied them up with pictures to make them more interesting. You're welcome.)

1. I once entered a BHG recipe contest with a strawberry limeade icebox pie. I did not win the contest, and exactly one month afterward, my magazine issues no longer included the contest details. It's possible that this was a coincidence. I think it's also possible they were trying to keep me from further embarrassment.

(It's hilarious how bad that looks to me now.)














2. I still don't know how to play my guitar. I tried to sell it before moving back to Texas, and no one wanted to buy it. Not even at a yard sale. It must have stank of poser too badly.

(Shameful.)


















3. I have subjected my son to the second child's curse. I don't have a copy of the first picture taken of my son. (The legitimate first photo was taken with a phone, which of course broke and I lost all of the files.) I called him by his sister's name less than 24 hours after his birth. I didn't have professional newborn pictures taken of him. He doesn't have a baby book. I didn't throw him a really big first birthday party like I did for his sister...
Not sure if it's because I am a bad mom or because I became a smart mom. Either way, I'm sorry you got jilted, son.

(Bonus fact: I actually remember fixing my hair before his birth so it would look good in the hospital pictures. Fail.)











4. I don't really know how to properly shoot a gun. I shoot them like this...

And like this...

And like this...

5. I was wearing Nathan's socks on our wedding day. I managed to remember to bring everything to the venue except for my socks and my daughter's shoes. In a panic, I sent Nathan's mother back to get the shoes and forgot the socks...for the second time. Nathan rescued me by giving me his pair and letting them be my "something borrowed."

(Which means that he wasn't wearing anything under his boots, which made that night at the hotel painfully hilarious.)











6. I skipped number 6 the first time and had to come back and add it in after publishing. I don't have a picture to detail this, so I will just follow with this image and we can ponder how in the age of digital cameras, I still take pictures like this one:

7. I own an Army Officer's Wife protocol book and have actually read it. It hasn't helped...
I was such a spazz of a 2LT's wife, that I put his rank on sideways. (You can literally see that people were trying not be annoyed at me as I fixed it!)

And this is how I act at parties, which I am pretty sure is also not advocated by the book:

8. No matter how old I get, or how deep I start to sound in some of these blogs, I will never stop thinking that things like this are funny:

9. An 11-year-old boy passed me at about mile 7 of this race.

When I passed him at about mile 10, I did the "Nelson Munson" laugh at him. (Not really, I just made the noise in my head.) But what really did happen was that somebody's husband jumped out of the car to take a picture of his wife running the race and told her to smile, and I very stupidly ran past her and smiled for the camera. I have no idea where my kids come by their competitive natures...











10. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

It's possible that it's because I have yet to do so...